Ahmad bin Naslan, Saya minta maaf…~

Have you ever wonder how old school moments that resented you from going to school then is bringing your laughter today?

My former classmate of 2 years, Ahmad bin Naslan googled himself and found something I wrote about him in my very abandoned blog, dated 2004.

I want to make a few announcement. I am not calling Ahmad Naslan a bastard after he stops calling me bitch last year. The word bastard that I called everyday is to a person who hurts me a lot and I hate him until I forgive him!

 

I perfectly stated that the word bastard wasn’t referred to him at all, although there was once back in form 4 we called each other bitch & bastard whenever we had arguments. We cant help not to fight because we sat next to each other, separated by the aisle. Well, we also sometimes cursed each other in Chinese. But we both had no hard feelings for that and the fight is not putting us anywhere.

Since you have brought this up, regardless you’re laughing at it or swear all you can, I still think that I should apologize and make it even. You are a great person, one of the guys that I enjoyed sharing the same class with. You are also one of the very person which helped me to survive in Europe, through Skype and YM. Thank you for the suggestions of the go-see places in Munich. I wished I was there even longer so we could meet up.

I have explained enough on Facebook and write a new piece for you. In case you googled yourself again, hopefully this blog shows up first before my old blog. See Madec, how popular you are nowadays? You are now Googliable. I’m glad the we all have grown up, sit back and laughing at this.

To extend my apologies, I specially dedicated this song to you. =D

 

I know it’s not going to last, but THANK YOU!~

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Happy Eid to All!~

A year has passed by and we came to another celebration of Eid. Prior to that, the Holy month of Ramadhan. I hope everyone had a great month and moments full of peace and religious rituals. I pray to God hoping that I would still be around for next Ramadhan as I was still being a total ignorant to understand the contentment.

Today is the first day of Syawal and I felt that I’ve been through another transition. It’s not going to be the same again as the years I previously enjoyed. I started to understand that I am not going to depend my life to anybody but myself. By right, I should be out of my parents’ custody, as in moving out and eligible for marriage. Or in Malay we say it, “Dah selesai tanggungjawab mak abah.” That’s what Hazwan said to my parents too.

There’s a feeling in my heart which words enough couldn’t even explain. I used to be so numb but not today. My mum asked me about him and left me no reason not to tell her my side of story. Still, my emotions were kept tight inside. We walked to the mosque with my sister and maids. We performed sunat tahiyatul masjid right after we arrived. When I sat down, all the memories came back. All of the things I’ve ever prayed for him dashed off my head. The Imam summoned for the Sunat Aidilfitri prayer made me forgot about it for a while. I wished the sound system could have been better.

The khutbah was read and I could hardly hear the gist of the message allowing my mind to be separated from my body. Without realising it, my tears started to shred and poured on my red cheeks. As much as I wanted to let all this out but I have to cover it from my sister and mother. They both did notice but never questioned. A moment after that, I started to feel myself at peace. Yes, it’s so calm and put me at my greatest rest.

For some reason I should learn to always, always exercise on my patience. Although being transparent and bluntly honest can never help me to solve my problems because another party would have mistaken me. So I need to always to consider people’s acceptance and white lies are strictly apply. I am a human and imperfect. I tend to forget all the things I’ve ever wished for and to be exact, never appreciate of what I have. Isn’t what’s been happening is what I’ve been wishing for? Didn’t I dream about all this before? Why complaint? Because I was being gelojoh. Above all, I am happy about us.

So I’ve learnt. I am very much at peace and looking forward for better days to come. My work will always get on my nerves. Well, hitting RM 100 k per month for individual from non-banking background is ridiculous! But doesn’t mean impossible too! Just need to keep on trying. To my younger cousins, sorry la ye, Kak Cbu tak mampu nak bagi duit raya tahun ni. Tunggula tahun depan… haha…

I’m having an open house next weekend. Very much unprepared. I wish J is still around. Farah knows how I was so crazy about him. J, how have you been? God, where can I find any guy like him? I really love to have him around. His energy, his thoughts, his charm, his sense of humour, the way he carries himself really impress me! But he left because there’s a better place for him that makes him happier. Sighs for me.

Before I end this post, I would like to wish every reader on my blog Happy Eid Mubarak, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir Batin. I’m seeking forgiveness and better days to live on. May God bless us all.

p/s: Congratulations Kamarul for your engagement!!! Yes, S is super cute but let’s leave it at that =). If you are looking for a personal loan with competitive rate and hassle-free, let me know too!

Heish… Hampir batal puasa aku

Nasib baik la tengok video ni time malam. Kalau tengok time matahari terbit, mesti habis pahala aku mencarut kat mamat yang buat video ni. Kenapa aku berkata sedemikian? Anda lihatlah sendiri…

Songs for you…

I would like to dedicate these videos and songs to my dear friend. This is the least I could do for you. Our commitments have set us to part. Just know that I’m here for you. I have no better words to say. May these songs heal your pain as they healed mine…

Take That – Patience

Just have a little patience

I’m still hurting from a love I lost
I’m feeling your frustration
Any minute all the pain will stop.

Just hold me close inside your arms tonight
Don’t be too hard on my emotions.

[Chorus:]
‘Cause I
Need time
My heart is numb, has no feeling
So while I’m still healing
Just try and have a little patience.

I really wanna start over again
I know you wanna be my salvation
The one that I can always depend.

I’ll try to be strong
Believe me I’m trying to move on
It’s complicated but understand me.

[Chorus]

‘Cause the scars run so deep
It’s been hard but I have to believe
Just have a little patience [x2]

[Chorus]

Have a little patience
My heart is numb, has no feeling
So while I’m still healing
Just try and have a little patience

My Super Long Entry

I’ve not updated my blog for a while. There are lotsa things happening and I couldn’t decide which one should go first. Anyway, I’ve graduated and my convocation was on 18th August. Things were pretty hectic at that time because I need to check my grades, the robes, the photo shoot, alongside with job interviews.

I think I’ve updated some of you about my upcoming job. But I am not going to disclose it here because macam poyo jer nak menjaja kerja baru… Let’s keep the details private. I know people has been talking the logic of my new job which is totally unrelated to my field of study.

In my defense, I would just say that having a technical background is just an added value that I got from formal education. But in reality, we all survive not only based on scholastic skills, but living skills. Some gain it from experience, some might have it from books. Both do come hand in hand to lead us an essential life. Regardless, I am just being positive on what’s coming.

For now, I’m developing my greed factor. Those who know me personally, they could see how I put myself to the minimum. I eat big but I dont really spend big, only to certain passion, like my Macbook and musical instruments! Hehe… Yeah, I couldn’t believe that I now have to pay the annual income tax! Aiseh… Baru nak jadi kaya, kerajaan sudah amek duit saya… Now, I am nurturing myself to be money-minded.

Anyway, I am not sure how life is going to treat me. I have planned my life until the age of 30. But that is without taking any external factors into account, like what if I just passed the government exam and need to start my service soon? What if I really love my job and decided to not further my postgraduate study? What if, IF I met the right man for me and it was the right time to start a family? Well, getting hitch wasn’t apart of my initial life planning before 30. Again, who knew.

Since I am back at home after being away for 6 years spent in various campuses, I am looking forward to catch up with old friends and loved ones. Still, it doesn’t change much because most of my bestfriends are pursuing medical related study and they are still in school. Some are flying off soon. Some are in postgrad study. There are a few in law schools and only God knows when they will finish chambering or whatever sort they need to complete. Since all of you were there for me, I hope you know that I am here for you as well. Although you never know this blog ever exist! Haha… I tak mencapub, okay!

Updates from Poland… Jarek just got married! Jarek was the guy who stayed next door, loves to Wiki and scuba diving. He’s a sweet guy and now an accountant in one of the world’s established accounting firm. Basia is getting married soon! Basia was one of my girlfriends back in the lab. We had a lot of things in common. And I dont who’s this new guy is. Karol is proposing to his girlfriend of 6 years soon! Hey, I am very excited to hear all this news and I wish I could be there for their big day… I feel that everything that happens around me is going on too fast and I have a hard time to get on track with everyone. But watch out people, I’m coming near you soon! Whatever~

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I got this from Mei Ee and just to share with all of you. It’s so funny and somehow reflecting what I really am, partially. For the record, I am type A+. Till then, Happy Ramadhan to all!~

The Life of the Blood Types.

Prayers Time Notification for MAC!

I know some people are already aware of this application. It’s called Guidance. You can download it for free at http://www.apple.com/download. I think there are other Application but I just bumped into it today (jakon).

Previously I was so annoyed to hear the the adzan on my friend’s laptop. Not only they were not around to monitor the alarm, yet it was so freaking loud that could break every walls of the room. Literally speaking, playing religious music loud to the max wont guarantee one a free ticket to heaven, nor explaining how stronger his faith is.

As I was saying, until when I was abroad, in the country  that only has one functional mosque, I started to miss the summon. To be frank, I am not the religious nor very extreme in pursuing religion. I am just a moderate Muslim who understand the teachings of my religion. However, if you see me deviating from the principles, it’s not because I bend the rules to suit me personally, but I refused to follow the truth. Fair enough?

Religion is religion. You should understand the meaning of Iman, then you’ll be able to deliberate the questions of your faith.

Back to the Azan application. I am happy to have it installed. It comes with various Azans including Yusof Islam’s recital. You can also control the volume so it wont be that disturbing, just appropriate enough to remind you to get off the laptop screen and perform your prayers.

Suddenly I started to think about umrah. Some of my friends are given the opportunity to perform it every year, or at least have done it. My parents went to umrah every Ramadhan. I hear them telling wonderful stories and experiences in the Holy Land. I wonder how’s the real feeling would be?